Finding the write way

I consider myself more of a technical writer - my legal background and analytical brain find ease in the writing of prompts, procedures, and policies. But after my mother and sister passed away, I sought to creative writing as a form of healing. I'd like to share some of the journaling I did to help me cope. Disclaimer: I am not a licensed mental health therapist; but I've learned a great deal from my therapy sessions and wish to talk openly about such a heavy topic.

The following assignment is obviously tailored to my grief and relationship with my mother, and may not resonate with you. Parts were intended to address my recurring ruminations. The point isn’t necessarily for you to copy this exercise, but to seek help from a trained medical professional, who would know how to guide you to express yourself and find catharsis.

My mother loved writing and drawing. She was always sending letters to family with hand-drawn cartoons. My counselor wanted me to write a three- letter series: 1) to mama, 2) to myself, and 3) to myself as if written by mama. The first two letters functioned as a journal entry; I asked mama to hug Francesca and included words of encouragement to my future self.

The letter from mama to myself helped bring closure from her unexpected death. I rifled through old emails and text messages to quote her verbatim. Using her coloring pencils, I sketched what I thought she would have drawn on the envelope; mama called me “pumpkin” and she was always dreaming of outer space.

As strange as it may sound, reading this letter truly felt like she was speaking to me. “At the end of my day, I just want you to be content no matter where your feet are standing. I love you so much, pumpkin” she wrote.